“My paintings are like creative diaries that unveil subconscious feelings and experiences that are so eye-opening for me to look back on.”
It all started when…
SOULDEGA: Who are you, where are you from and where does your artist journey begin?
NAJAI: I am Najai Janique Johnson, also known as Nanee or N’Tice! I am an black erotic fine artist and sex worker! I am from New Orleans, Louisiana. My journey began with photography oddly enough! I started photography in high school and eventually went to college with the pursuit of photography still in mind. Throughout my short-lived college career, I learned a plethora of artistic mediums and the ones that stuck with me were my painting and drawing classes. I also learned that the lack of traditional schooling should never limit your abilities and/or capabilities under any circumstances. Learning and growth goes way beyond traditional schooling. So after dropping out, life/adulting hit and I was in such a negative headspace. I felt like my only emotional outlet was to do some form of art but I felt so uninspired with digital photography. I know that photography is more about your “eye” than it is camera quality, but I couldn’t shake the thought that: with the inevitable progression of technology, a “great” photo could easily be captured with a phone. I decided to put more of my time into film photography, a medium I formerly disliked. I disliked it for personal reasons and that is because I kept exposing my film to light in the developing process. This time around, I became way more patient and formed a love for film photography. At some point, film wasn’t bringing me that instant gratification we all get after creating. I felt like I needed to step outside of my comfort zone and create something more tangible. In 2018, I decided that I’d teach myself a new medium every year starting with drawing. 2019 was painting and 2020 was performance art and some tattooing. These are all mediums I look forward to growing in, but painting has my heart. Painting has brought me my most introspective moments. It’s therapeutic and healing for me. My paintings are like creative diaries that unveil subconscious feelings and experiences that are so eye-opening for me to look back on.
SOULDEGA: Your art explores raw and sensual concepts within human nature, what drives you to create some of your pieces like “The Kamasutra: Basset Hound 25/240”?
NAJAI: As both an artist and sex worker, I love pushing the emphasis of intimacy. Intimacy can be sexual but by definition, intimacy is closeness. I think that’s so important because we are all so connected, but we’re not. These pieces are made to make you feel a sense of discomfort because sometimes, viewers don’t quite know what they’re looking at for a minute until they’re “pleasantly surprised”. It’s always fun to watch people view my art, it tickles me. It is so much more about understanding than it is sex. There’s so much shame tied to sex/sexual experiences, that make things perceptively taboo. That is what The Kamasutra series explores. It’s also explores the idea that sex sells: a timeless commodity. The underlying importance of any of the pieces I create will always be to: learn compassion, empathy, and to value others the same exact way you value yourself. And if you can’t do that, start with valuing yourself.
SOULDEGA: If you don’t mind sharing with us, what was your emotional connection to “You live in my lap”? Can you walk us through the process of your painting?
NAJAI: “You Live in My Lap” was named after the song by OutKast, “She Lives in My Lap”. I didn’t figure out the name until the very end of the painting. It just made so much sense when it finally came to me. Around the time I began this painting, the world was grieving the passing of various black men and women (ie. Breonna Taylor, George Floyd, Daniel Prude). The consecutive murders of these black individuals weighed heavier than the pandemic. I’d like to preface this by saying that all of my artworks are open to interpretation and may have more than one meaning. The center of “You Live in My Lap” displays a black man laying in the middle of bodies reaching out and laying around him with a red hand peering over his shoulder. Red symbolizes life, health, vigor, war, courage, anger, love and religious fervor. Red also symbolizes blood. Many people take the phrase “she lives in my lap” to have a sexual connotation. This is indeed intentional, but the other meaning is that the girl he’s talking about is in his “lap”, as in “loop” or “cypher” like running a track. She runs his mind all the time, thus she lives in his “lap”. “Lap” or “Loop” could also be seen as the endless cycle of black oppression. “You Live in My Lap” also touches on the fetishization of black people and the fact that black men are a target in many ways. “You Live in My Lap” is a political and sexual piece.
SOULDEGA: If you can choose your most favorite painting you’ve done thus far, what would it be and why?
“There’s so much shame tied to sex/sexual experiences, that make things perceptively taboo.”
NAJAI: “I.D.,Ego, and SuperEgo” has to be my favorite painting to date. I love this one because it is more personal for me. This piece has everything to do with maturing into myself, learning about myself, how to navigate and identify my emotions through challenging times, self-identity, and self-love. I feel like over the course of making that painting, I matured by a year or two! I got out of a relationship about 6 months ago and all I could think about is how much of myself I had lost or had yet to discover. Evolution is a lifelong process of course, but after that relationship, I felt evolved. I love this piece because it is one of my largest works I have out now. It also explores a different style in comparison to my earlier works. According to Freud psychoanalytic theory, the I.D. is the primitive and instinctual part of the mind that contains sexual and aggressive drives and hidden memories (instincts), the Superego operates as a moral conscience (morality), and the Ego is the realistic part that mediates between the desires of the id and the super-ego (reality). I feel like self-love has been something I’ve always struggled with and “I.D.,Ego, and SuperEgo” speaks on my growth in that area.
SOULDEGA: What have been some challenges you’ve faced in your artistry, and how have you overcome them? What have been some rewards?
NAJAI: My biggest challenge is not feeling like a credible artist because I don’t have the desirable credentials to back me up. I am a fairly new self-taught painter, so for a while I felt like I was not capable of accomplishing many things without a degree which certainly isn’t true. After dropping out, I felt like I was getting a list of consecutive denials. Those moments definitely beat up my confidence. For a bit, I felt embarrassed to call myself an artist because “I was not worthy of that title”. I’ve been able to showcase/vend at various galleries and shows, be in competitions, create my own website, sell original works and print. I’m beyond grateful and now realize that consistency, confidence, and voice are all keys. I only look forward to what’s to come for me!
SOULDEGA: Are there any artists past or present that have inspired your artistry?
NAJAI: Mario Testino is a portrait and fashion photographer. I loved his portraits specifically. He captured his subjects so authentically. He always created risky and intriguing images. When I was doing my research on his life, I was interested to find that he purposely would dye his hair pink just to bring attention to himself. That is how his notoriety came about. He also started his photography with a small point and shoot camera. At the time, I found this information so inspiring because as said before, self confidence was something I’ve struggled with and here Mario Testino was just going for it. Another artist I adore is Salvador Dalí. I love his whimsical style and use of space/atmosphere. I love the idea of optical illusions, combined images, and distortion. Salvador Dalí embodies all of that. George Condo inspires me. I enjoy how eerie his images can be. When I look at them, It’s almost like I can hear them. I also love how he uses different styles of animation in one piece. Lastly, I get inspiration from Mark Rothko. I’ve never seen color portray emotion and meaning the way Mark Rothko does it.
